Monday, March 26, 2007

A Place I Used To Call Home

It's been too long.

I got back from my trip to Alberta on Friday. Before I arrived on Friday I was worried about fitting back into my schedule snuggly. As soon as I was in Rob's arms at the airport I knew that everything would fit back into place quite nicely.

My trip was something that I needed to do. I really wanted for so long, to go back to where I'm from. Go back to my roots; country music, lifted expensive trucks, drinking with old friends and visiting with family. But, once I arrived I felt an emptiness that nothing could fill.

First we arrived in Edmonton and stayed with my brother and his girlfriend Jess. They live in a penthouse on top of the Northgate Towers. It's more like a bachelor pad, but it's familiar and I feel fairly comfortable there. We did a lot of dining and drinking while we were there. Lincoln's birthday was that Thursday and we went out and saw lots of old friends of Linc's. The only thing was that I took about seventy pictures, all of which I deleted by mistake before I had the chance to save them. But the night out was a lot of fun, except for the giant drunk fight my bro had with me later that evening. I would rather not get into it, because there's just too much to say and so much that I can't make sense of.

I went onto Drayton Valley with Kyli to visit our dad and step mom. That was a great visit because we got to see lots of family. Dad and Shelley truly are great hosts. And for the first time in a long time, dad really seemed to take on his role as "dad". It was very comforting knowing that he was there and willing to do anything to make our stay a good one. They were great and I am very thankful to have them in my life.

Next I went to Miss Katie's humble abode. Her boyfriend Eric and her live in a "chainsaw massacre-like" small town in the middle of nowhere, haha. But it is quaint and cute all the same. The weather was a factor in my stay in Peers. It was cold and snowing so I think that's why Peers didn't seem as welcoming. But they should be very proud of themselves. They have a wonderful little home and are a very happy little couple. Katie had a room for me that didn't have any cat hair in it, which was puuuurfect. Hehe.

We went to Hinton, where we grew up together. I got to see Carmelle, which was so nice. I pretty well haven't heard from her since I saw her last. So it was refreshing getting to be around her again. I visited with Katie's mom and step dad Dwayne and then later on her dad Gary. It was so nice walking into her parents' homes and having them know me and want to chit chat. I'm not used to people knowing me here and the familiarity was also very comforting. The weather sucks in Alberta and I forgot how unwelcoming the bare trees are, but those mountains painted forever in the distance were breathtaking. I embraced them so much more this visit. I never ever appreciated them when I lived there. But now when I see them I feel happy knowing that we were fortunate enough to live around them for as long as we did.

Our Hinton night out was a success! I saw many old friends and acquaintances. I felt like a million bucks and was just thrilled to be able to tell people that I was living on the island with my boy. Let's just say that I saw the right people and I had a good time.

But, having said all of that. I was so thrilled to come home. This truly is my home and I belong nowhere else now. This trip made me feel more fortunate for what I have. I feel blessed to have been sent this way and I am very pleased with the path I have chosen.

Re-takes of our first part of the visit in Edmonton
Luckily it was our first and last part of the trip.

Us in front of our very first house in Drayton!

On the way to Hinton. Look at those mountains!

It was fun..haha.

My drunken buddies!

Thursday, March 08, 2007

No Time To Do Nothing

There's been so much to keep me busy these last few weeks. Even if my life doesn't feel all that exciting and busy it is time consuming. Being me, is a lot of work apparently.

I feel like I work a lot, like most people in the world. I spend another chunk of my "after work hours" at the gym running. But lately I have been skipping a little. I still go at least three times a week. But I do feel a bit guilty. I come home from work, go straight to the gym and then when I get home.. Rob's looking at me to help him with dinner. So I do, or I don't. Then there's possible hostility from him if I don't. Haha. It's just easier to help and then.......... I get to shower.. Then and only then, do I usually get to relax. Of course, I'm not complaining. There isn't a whole lot going on every evening, but it just seems to take up so much time.

We had a spontaneous adventure to Victoria one Saturday after work. We just spent one night there having a few drinks at Ky and Joe's apartment. Sometimes we just need to get out of this little town.

Alex and Andrew invited us to Andrew's place to join them in a turkey roast. Their friends were there and we met a few people. I had a good time because it was so much like back home. There was a big fire in the backyard which is pretty well all bushes. He lives out of town a bit and there aren't a lot of other houses that close by. It was nice to do something different too.

My mom and I have patched things up which is always great! We are learning how to deal with the new in our lives with better attitudes and fairness.

Yesterday was a dreary day for the family. Lincoln sounded down and of course mom was a bit too. I didn't get to speak with my sister but I can bet she probably wasn't having the best of days either. Rudi's been gone for two years now and it doesn't feel like it and yet it does all at the same time.

I miss him but in a different way. It's not as fresh of a loss. So I guess I am getting used to the fact that he is gone, more and more. There is a lot of new going on in our lives lately and that is helping me to move forward with everything.

I'll never forget Rudi, ever. But I have learned to live without him indefinetly. And for the first time I don't feel guilty about that.

We started out with just the two of us when we
moved here and lots has changed since then. But
really, in the long run, it's still the two of us....